Dog Shirts, Old Friends And Baby Got No Back.

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I was walking down the street yesterday, freshly showered after a hard shoulder workout at Club H, and drinking a tasty "Mango Tango" protein shake, and carrying a "Classic Club" (very tasty, try it) on whole wheat from Quiznos.

Quick segue: Someone would make a killing in this town if an Energy Kitchen or The Pump opened up shop in Hoboken. I mean, think how many residents work out and then want a good, clean kitchen to order low-fat, low-sodium dinners? Hoboken411 reported an Energy Kitchen was opening up, but I think that fell through. Please don't mention "Pita Grill" to me. Should call it "Cardboard Taste Grill". I ate there at least 8 times, over the years, and i'm never satisfied with anything I have ordered.

Moving on.

I was walking down the street across Washington and 1st street, towards my house when I see two people head of me, next to City Hall, walking two well fed, dogs a pug and a puggle (For the record, I like Pugs and not fond of Puggles). Both dogs were wearing dog-sport-shirts, I read one that was blue/red and said "New York". Part of me was rolling my eyes because a) I was frankly amazed how overweight the small dogs were and b) I think any animal that is forced to wear clothing is stupid. Unless it is winter, and the dog's natural coat can't handle the cold, but it was a nice spring day about 55 degrees out.

I'm looking at the owners, and both are two well-fed Hobokenites, a guy and a girl, who appear to be in their early 30's. The guy is in a suit, with a ill fitting long black raincoat over a sloppy suit with a loosened tie. He's balding - one of those stubborn balding guys who think they aren't bald, and keep fighting to keep some kind of sembalance of a hair cut going. He's talking to her, and both of them are your typical LOUD YUPPIE HOBOKENITES that give the rest of us a bad name. The kind of Americans who go on holiday to Europe and annoy the the rest of the world with their loud, obnoxious behavior. I'm watching both of them and inwardly groaning at the both of them.

The girl is wearing a light blue pullover around her rotound frame, jeans that aren't flattering AT ALL, they hang limply from her waist, straight down to her legs - where normally 90% of the world has something for Sir-Mix-A-Lot to sing about - she has nothing. Baby got no back.

Now, bear with me people.

Look, I try not to be terribly judgemental.

Ok, scratch that, i'm kind of judgemental.

Very judgemental?

Ok, i'm basically the Judge Smails of Hoboken (bonus points if you know who that is without Google).

But seriously. Overweight and no ass? It's like a double whammy. I mean the one caveat of overweight women is that they have curves in the right places over the stick thin women with flat chests and no ass.

Yea, so, i'm a guy. I walk down the street. I look at girls. The straight men are checking out the girl's body and the gay men are checking out her shoes. I think 99.95% of the men do this. The other .05% are liars.

Then...slowly...slowly...I recognize the assless girl by the time I reached the corner of 1st and Bloomfield.

I haven't talked to this girl in over a year. I she was once a pretty good friend. You haven't been in Hoboken very long if you haven't lost friends over bullshit drama. She was now married and that was her husband she was walking with.

I was having a dilemma, while I walked behind them. Part of me was thinking I should stop and say hello. It's been so long, and honestly, I just have no real interest in being phony with someone that I really don't like. I certainly have no problem being cordial with people I don't like. But i'm not going to go out of my way to say hello to someone like this.

The couple were walking side by side on the sidewalk, taking up about 85% of the sidewalk. I walk very fast, and they are walking too slow, letting their dogs sniff everything they pass. I want to pass them, I literally will have to brush past one of them, with a hurried "Excuse Me", which would draw attention to me.

I looked for an opening between Bloomfield and Garden, right outside of Mulligan's...and I walked across the street to where the Guitar Shop is, and kept walking down 1st to avoid the risk that i'd have to talk to them.

I continued my brisk walk, and decided cut back over to the other side of the street at O'Donohughes. I'm sure they could have saw me cross the street. I'm sure they could have recognized me. I didn't really care if they saw me from behind.

While passing OD's, I heard them behind me, on the corner of Garden and 1st, still talking very loud to each other. Like the kind of people who walk down the street yapping on a cell phone.

Yes, a day in the life, and these are the things I think about. Am I the only one? I mean writing this I kind of feel bad, but it's what I was thinking. Maybe I write what other people don't say or maybe i'm just an analomy.

I was thinking later as to what stopped me from talking to her. We never left each other on bad terms. I just didn't want to go through the whole pleasantries. Part of me wasn't in the mood. If I ever ran into her at a bar or whatever, i'd be nice. I certainly don't hate her. She broke my trust once, and that's it for me. You lose my trust and you lose my friendship. She's just not a part of my life anymore.

That's about it.

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This page contains a single entry by Furey published on April 15, 2008 12:24 AM.

Good Manners In The Big City was the previous entry in this blog.

The Good Samaritian Traffic Cop is the next entry in this blog.

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